Updated: Sep 27, 2019
Today is a short writing - new beginnings but old pain, a constant roller coaster I am learning. Self doubt plays a huge role in my depression, as I’ve always had drag be the front and center part of my life. I have accomplished a lot over the last 7 years being part of the drag industry, but focusing my energy on what it means to me, to be... I guess me. Thats where things get tricky. There's no rule book on being trans and or being a woman, it’s all a self discovery in the making. Even though I have been transitioning for the last 3 years I still don’t have a handle on what that truly looks like. There is a conflicting matter in if Tristan still exists or is existing and is Tygra thriving or is she surviving. These mental notes play inside of my head constantly but I push forward knowing everything truly works on for the best when you are working towards it.
Currently my life is taking a turn for the best. Since returning from nationals and taking the step to focus more on myself, I've made little changes that I forsee will be making a huge impact. As I have already informed you all I am accepting less bookings, I'm finishing my last year of this associate's degree, and I’m spending more time with those that make me happy. I'm sure as i keep pressing forward in writing every week I’ll have more to say but I am still in the beginning stages of understanding what I’d like to say, what I want everyone to know, relearning my boundaries and above all putting myself first.
Writing these little notes on a weekly basis they’ll get longer and I hope to bring some sort of light to others from my experiences and what I am going through, as I normally do on my social media platforms. I hope we can grow together. So until next week... stay fierce.